Rainey: Spark of Insanity 1

Rainey: Spark of Insanity

Part 1


Fate is never as clear-cut as we are led to believe.  In the realm of our imagination, good must always prevail over evil.  The villains of fiction are never successful, and justice always reigns supreme.  That is one of the undeniable truths that we are taught through fiction, and because of this, we grow up with ideas of balance and equality in the world.  Ultimately, we are left unprepared for the harsh reality of our own existence.

Our own belief of goodness and happiness send us down the path to failure and destruction.  Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.

My name is Doctor John Lewis Rainey, and I am a victim of Fate.  

I had a dream once, to become a doctor and cure all of the world’s illnesses.  My younger sister and I had put our lives into accomplishing this task.  We found hope in Iris City, the town where we had planned to become doctors together, and dedicate our lives towards making the world a better place.  

But I lost everything while chasing this dream.  I lost friends, family, and now I have become a criminal.  I have failed in my goals, and now, I only have one goal left.  I have only a single reason for continuing to exist.  

My sister…

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I scribbled some words into my journal, and closed the book.  I’m not usually the type who enjoys writing journals, but I feel that if I don’t write my thoughts down now, what remains of my mind will surely be lost.  If that happens, then I’ll never accomplish my goal.

It’s been several weeks since I rescued her from the Facility.  I hope that Alexia’s still okay.  It’s hard to tell in this place, this empty shell of a home.  

It’s easy to lose track of time in a place that has been completely abandoned for years.  

I slowly pulled myself up from that ancient chair and walked to the window.  The windows are boarded up in this abandoned house, but I still try to take in the light that comes in between the wooden planks barring the windows from time to time.  That, and looking out the window also helps to keep an eye out for…undesirable attention…

“John, are you okay?”

I turned to face Alexia, who stared at me with deep concern.  “I’m okay,” I replied flatly, “Why did you come here?”  “No reason,” she replied, her thick blond hair swaying in an intangible wind, “I’m just worried about you.”  “You don’t have to worry about me,” I retorted as I turned and looked out the window again, “I can take care of myself.”

“I think you’re starting to lose it, John,” she replied, “I think you should turn yourself in.”

“That can’t happen,” I said without looking at her, “Not until my goals are complete.”

“And just what are your goals, John?  It is worth the damage you’ve caused?”

….

Was it worth it?  Becoming a criminal and losing so many friends?  Was my goal worth it?  I decided to check.

I walked past Alexia and out of the room.  I slowly inched down the hallway as the worn floorboards creaked and groaned under my weight.  Was it worth it?  I froze as a foreign sound echoed through the lifeless building.  After several minutes of silence, I slowly resumed my progress down the lonely passage.  I finally reached my destination in front of the bathroom door, and slowly opened it.

I stared at this empty bathroom, instinctively searching for what I already knew I would never find.  Rusted pipes and torn strips of cloth covered the old wooden floor.  The sink and toilet were cracked from time, and the mirror was completely covered by years of built-up mildew.  There were several places in the floorboards that had rotted all the way through to the floor below.  It was truly a horrific sight.  The last thing my eyes focused on was the bathtub at the far side of the room.  I slowly walked across the room, carefully avoiding the weak points in the floorboards, until I stood solemnly over the bathtub.  I didn’t want to look inside, but my body would not grant me the freedom of that choice.  I slowly shifted my eyes down towards the tub, until I could see her face clearly.

My sister, wrapped in white cloth, lay submerged in a green chemical of my own making.  I stared at her face as she rested, motionless, until the day would come that I could save her.  Until then…she would be the symbol of my mission…my burden…and my sin…

My legs suddenly gave way as I fell to my knees and wept.

“What’s wrong, John?”  Alexia said from behind me, “Are you okay?”

“Why are you doing this?” I choked out between sobs, “Why are you trying to destroy me?!”  “What do you mean?” she replied looking down at me, “I don’t understand.”  

I took a deep breath, stood up to face her.

“You’re not Alexia.  She’s dead.”

I blinked several times, and suddenly realized that I was alone in the bathroom.  The hallucination was over.  I turned to look at my sister’s corpse once more before returning to my room.  “Alexia,” I said aloud as I reached down to brush several strands of blond hair from her face, “I’m going to save you one day.  I’m going to bring you back from the dead!”  I quickly realized my folly afterwards.   

Talking to a dead body was pointless.

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It’s been several days since Alexia visited me.  Maybe it was all just a hallucination, but I’m starting to wish that she visited me more often.  Misery loves company, it has been said.  

I can’t for the life of me figure out how to solve this problem.  I’ve spent the past week studying books, formulas, and ancient writings, all in an attempt to understand the essence of human life.  However, my research only seems to bring up more questions. What creates the spark of life?  How can it be recreated?  What is the human soul?  If I could just figure out how life begins in humans, I may be able to being Alexia back to life sooner than I thought.  I’ll just have to keep studying…

Alexia…

I’ve slowly come to terms with my growing insanity.  It has been said that when someone is truly insane, they don’t realize it.  Maybe my recognition of my own slipping sanity is proof that I’m still at least partially sane.  Unfortunately, if I don’t figure out a plan soon, what little sanity I have will fade into obscurity.  I’ve kept my journal close, as to document my thoughts and feelings.  It is a temporary cure for my decaying mind.

Although I haven’t seen or heard from Alexia over the past few days, I have been visited by several other shadows of my past from time to time.  One of the more interesting shadows came just last night, while I was studying the texts.  “You should really get some sleep, John,” Eric said standing in front of the window, “You don’t want to repeat what happened before.  You could have saved my life if you hadn’t gotten too caught up in your work.”  “Shut up,” I said without looking at him, “You know I tried my best to save you.”  “Oh?” he retorted angrily, “Is that before or after you tried to kill me…twice!”  “I wasn’t the cause of your death, Eric!” I yelled as I jumped to my feet.  When I turned to glare at him, he was already gone.

How annoying.

If these hallucinations are going to simply disappear like that, they should at least stay long enough for me to argue my case!

*******************************

Today, I have to leave the safety of this abandoned building.  I need to meet with someone who can help me accomplish my goals.  I’ll have to leave Iris City, of course.  With the law against me now, I’ll be arrested if I try to work in the city.  If I can maintain my sanity for just a few more days, I’ll finally be able to begin working towards my goals.  I may even be able to revive Alexia…

I grabbed my jacket, which was the tattered remains of my white lab coat, and my thick leather coat, and walked to the back door of the abandoned building I was living in.  If I didn’t hurry, I would be late to the meeting with my accomplice, and that would certainly be rude.  With the police still searching for me, if I am caught now, Alexia will never live again.    

“Where are you going, John?” I heard Alexia say from behind me.  When I turned to look, there was nothing there.  My mind’s slipping.  It’s only a matter of time before…

No.  I cannot be captured, under any circumstances.  And I cannot lose my mind, not yet at least.

I took a deep breath, and walked out the back door of the building.  

Alexia…wait for me…

TO BE CONTINUED…